The S Jobs
by PaBurke
Summary: First Dates are always the most interesting.
1. Chapter 1

The Sketchbook Job

By PaBurke

Disclaimer: not mine

Rating: G-ish

"Hey, you can draw."

Evan Lorne turned to face the woman hanging upside down on the monkey bars. She was yawning and stretching easily. She looked comfortable. She was pretty and blonde and in very good shape. She swung off the monkey bars and walked right up to him.

"Hi. I'm Parker. I can draw too. I used to think that everyone could, but Nate says that I'm special."

A bit bemused, Evan shook her hand. "Evan Lorne."

Parker had his sketchbook in her hands in such a smooth move that Evan had to blink. She flipped through it with no hesitation at personal boundaries. He had –at General O'Neill's request- drawn the national museum complex. "I love it. It's so accurate. Most people just skip over the security cameras. That can be a thing of beauty too." She was so earnest and serious. She was crazy.

It was kinda cute.

"I like you. Wanna have sex?"

Evan blinked. He had not expected that. He glanced at his watch. He had time. He had finished early. He really, really shouldn't. It wasn't as if he played Kirk like Colonel Sheppard or Dr. Jackson.

But Parker was dragging him off and into a backyard tree house of an abandoned home. He had to go along.

She still had his sketchbook.


	2. Chapter 2

The Security ID Job

Parker had just walked into the communal apartment/headquarters. She was very cheerful and bouncy, somewhat more so than he had seen before. Eliot didn't know if it was within the range of normal Parker craziness or if he should be worried.

Hell, he was already justifiably worried.

Then someone knocked on the door. Hardison answered it and soon after yelped. By the time Eliot could see what was happening, the stranger had knocked Hardison down and out of the way in a distinctive Special Ops move and had his gun trained on Eliot. Eliot could respect that kind of man.

He was looking at Parker. "You took my ID," he said mildly. "I need it back."

Parker pouted at Nate. "I don't have to give it back, do I?"

"Yes," the stranger told Parker. "You do. I don't want to kill anyone," he was looking at Eliot as he said it and Eliot knew that the stranger would shoot to kill before the hitter could take him out, "but I need my ID. Now."

"Parker, give him his ID," Nate ordered.

Parker sighed dramatically, dragged her feet over and offered the ID. The stranger accepted it and waved Parker away. He glanced over the ID, making sure that it was his, then he placed it at his wrist.

From his place on the floor, Hardison frowned. "Did you just scan it?"

"Yes. This is not my barcode, Parker," he announced.

"Parker," Nate echoed.

"I wanted to see what it would open," the girl whined.

"You don't want me calling for reinforcements." The soft threat made Eliot stiffen.

"Now, Parker," Nate reiterated.

She sighed but handed it over. Again, the stranger waited until Parker stepped back and then he scanned the barcode. Though Eliot couldn't hear anything, it must have been the right one. Finally he relaxed. "Thank you, Parker. Have a nice day."

"Wait!" Parker called out. "Evan!"

He paused halfway out the door.

"You want to go on another date?"

Evan blinked. Eliot could sympathize, Parker made a lot of people do that.

Parker just ploughed ahead. "I haven't stolen anything from that museum yet and that's what you're doing tonight. We could do it tonight, together. It'll be a great date!"

Evan shook his head slowly and, if Eliot was paying attention, regretfully. "No Parker. I don't mix business with pleasure. I do hope I see you again under less… stressful circumstances."

"What's wrong with now?" The crazy girl was genuinely confused.

Evan just said, "Goodbye," and walked out the door. Parker chased after him. Eliot and the rest of the guys crowded around the open door just in time to see her tackle him. "You forgot to kiss me goodbye."

Eliot saw the effective moves Evan used to get out of her grasp and noticed that the man was slow to extradite himself from Parker's lips. Evan was very aware of where Parker placed her hands (he was not about to lose his ID again) and where Eliot and the others were standing. Finally, Evan stepped out of Parker's embrace, whispered "Goodbye Parker," kissed her once on her nose and walked away.

The whole team watched him go.

Parker bounced over to the guys. "Isn't he great? I think I want to keep this boyfriend."

"I give it a week before he goes screaming for the hills," Hardison said.

"He's military," Eliot added. "He'll be back on tour soon. Parker won't do long-distance."

Nate merely wrapped an arm around Parker's shoulders and smiled. "He treats you very well."

Parker bounced again. "I know."


	3. Chapter 3

The Stand Up Job

Summary: The actual job. The Sketchbook Job was supposed to be a one-shot but then Parker had grabby hands and wanted more. She wanted Lorne and was willing to steal my muse until she got 'im.

Sergeant Ezra Rogers found great amusement in the fact that he, as a preacher's kid, was among the two Marines that General O'Neill assigned to help Major Lorne recover the Ancient artifact that the museum had acquired. From the twinkle in the general's eye, he was amused as well.

Ezra's experience with crypto-security made him an obvious choice. His normal job was constantly updating and improving the intra-net, computers and firewalls of the SGC and Area 51. Sergeant Lance Baker, the other Marine, was Recon through and through. Search and rescues, and escape and evading were his specialties. His job was to ensure that the general's thieving little group didn't get caught.

Ezra didn't know what the Ancient device did and he bet that neither did the scientists at this point in time. It didn't matter. The device had started emitting energy earlier this week. For the safety of all around, the SGC had to move it to a safe location without the Trust –or anyone else- realizing that it was of interest to the SGC.

While Ezra's time in the SGC had been one unique experience after another, this was on a different level. The job had begun with a meet with a kid. Hopefully he was twenty, or the general was corrupting minors. The kid had acquired three staff key cards and several of the security codes. Ezra was surprised and pleased at the completeness. The more the kid accomplished beforehand, the less Ezra would be required to do now. The kid also drove them to the museum.

Due to some Trust operative on the Daedalus, the SGC couldn't use the Asgaurd technology to beam the artifact out of the museum. Ezra wondered if he should consider all the difficulties as a sign, or file it with the fact that General O'Neill was going the low-tech route to keep himself amused.

So here they were.

Ezra followed Baker into the museum and the major took drag. Lance knew his shit. And Ezra knew his. Silently, smoothly, the three entered the museum. Ezra did his bit and honestly, it wasn't as challenging as Area 51. They had made it past the first three anti-chambers when Baker turned around sharply. Ezra followed suit in time to see a figure in black repel from the ceiling,

"I knew you wouldn't stand me up, Evan," she said softly, but in a voice that carried clearly.

"Parker," the major said.

She wrapped her arm around Lorne's. "What are we here to steal?"

"Is there any way I can convince you to go home," Lorne asked the woman.

"Leave our date early?" She was horrified and hurt. The tone was identical to Ezra's last girlfriend's when the SGC had called him back to duty unexpectedly.

"Let's go," the major told Baker.

Baker nodded once and resumed the lead. Parker coiled up her line and slung it over her shoulder. Ezra had to use his handheld computer and all of the key cards to get the group into the main chamber. Parker watched like a hawk and Ezra got the feeling that he had just barely passed a test. Finally, they entered the correct room. The Ancient artifact was on, and its lights danced around the room.

"Pretty," Parker said. "It didn't do that earlier."

The major stepped forward with a stern look on his face. Ezra knew that Look. He obeyed that Look. The Ancient device shut off. And that was why a gene carrier had been included.

Parker stood there confused. "What just happened?"

No one answered her. Lorne stepped forward to open the case. Parker grabbed his wrist. "Let me do that," she pleaded. "You're too honest to let me take something extra and a souvenir of our date. Please?"

Lorne stepped back and handed Parker the inert replica. Ezra watched a professional switch the device from the case. She was slick. Where had the major found her? Ezra glanced around and was relived to note that Baker was keeping watch.

Parker held out the device to Lorne, but the major stepped back and Ezra accepted it and placed it in Colonel Carter's special box. Baker led the way to the exit and a half-mile away. Once out, Ezra took the security cameras off their loops and breathed a sigh of relief.

Ezra climbed on the motorcycle that had been selected as his 'get away vehicle.' Baker climbed unto his and put on his helmet. Lorne handed Parker his motorcycle helmet, but then the kid returned in the car. He left the engine running and motioned to Parker for the helmet. She tossed it to him.

The kid told Lorne to, "Scrub any mess out of the backseat."

Ezra could see the major's blush, even in the dark. Lorne hustled Parker into the car and drove away. Ezra started up his bike and followed Baker and the kid to the rendezvous point with the general. General O'Neill was sitting in the park playing with a yo-yo. O'Neill raised an eyebrow when he saw the kid on the bike instead of the major.

"Lorne's thief showed up," the general said without any surprise.

"Ya, sure, you betcha," the kid answered.

O'Neill motioned with his hand to Ezra. Ezra handed over the Carter Box. O'Neill opened the box and was nearly blinded by the lights. Just as fast, the general shut it off.

"Good job," he told the crew. "Repot to the base at 0800 for a debrief and to fill out your reports. Dismissed."

Baker and Ezra saluted the general, climbed back on their motorcycles and drove their separate ways.

All was well.

Ezra thought that all SGC missions should be this easy.


	4. Chapter 4

The Social Networking Job

The Leverage crew stood on at the darkened windows and watched 'Evan' walk Parker to the door and kiss her goodnight. So she had caught up to him while he was thieving and neither of them had gotten arrested.

"Hardison, did you find anything on him?" Eliot asked.

"Major Evan Lorne, US Air Force, real name," the hacker responded immediately. "High praise from most of his CO's. On the fast track for bigger and better things, specifically a general's star. Was completely out of contact for more than a year." Hardison paused. "He's part of Area 52."

Eliot winced.

Nate saw the flinch. "What do you know, Eliot?"

"General O'Neill runs it. It's secret and it's important. O'Neill's a good man and he never hesitates getting his hands dirty to do what needs to be done. He's fair, knows his men and cares for them. He won't leave any behind if he can help it. Only men like that would move up the ladder."

"He treats her right," Nate observed quietly.

"He sees us," Eliot added.

"He's an honest thief," Sophie said. "It appears that she was attracted to someone like her father figure."

Nate ignored her. "Does he know what he's getting into? He won't be able to have a star and Parker."

Hardison had to laugh. "Hell, no one knows what they're getting into with Parker."

Evan walked into his hotel room, alone, and was not surprised to see Jack O'Neill's clone waiting for him. Evan nodded once, "Sir. I see that O'Neill is making good use of you."

The clone shrugged a bit and took another sip of Evan's beer. He motioned to the thick files on the table. "That's what we know about Parker and her unit."

Evan sense of fairness reared up. "What happens between Parker and I are our business. No one else's."

"They hacked you. Hardison went as far as Area 52 and stopped abruptly. He's crossed us before."

"I'm leaving for the city in two weeks," Evan reminded his de-aged CO.

"I bet you twenty bucks that you will have two more 'dates' with the lovely Parker before then."

"Make it fifty and you're on."


	5. Chapter 5

The Stratus Job

Evan had been rock climbing in the most difficult part of the Appalachian Mountains Virginia had to offer. He had been climbing without any safety line for fun and for practice. It wasn't his favorite place to climb, but it was close enough to DC that he could drive out after meetings. He needed the quiet and the nature after hours of bureaucracy.

He nearly killed himself when Parker surprised him on the edge of a cliff. Only their combined quick reflexes and her very strong safety line saved him.

After Parker kissed him breathless (assuming that him hanging on to her for dear life was an invitation to intimacy) she pulled back and started scolding him. "Where is your harness?"

"I do without."

"Not very well." Parker was blunt. "I'm going to make you a harness."

Evan transferred himself back onto the rocks. "You don't need to do that."

"I want you to stay alive and I know that my harnesses don't fail. And once you have it, you better wear it or I'll send Eliot to make you."

Evan had to smile at the threat and the caring behind it. "It can't interfere with my thigh holster or my tac vest."

"Eliot will help me. He knows those specs."

"If it fits, I'll wear it," he promised.

Parker nodded decisively. "Good."

Evan continued to climb to the top. Parker flitted around him like a butterfly, repelling down and then climbing up. She made it look fun, easy and freeing. On the edge of the cliff, Evan shared his water and granola. Parker shared gummy worms she had swiped from one of her coworkers. There were layers to Parker and Evan enjoyed watching her reveal each one.

Then he realized that he had twelve more days of leave and one more meeting that clone O'Neill would consider a date. He better get the cash out of the bank.

O'Neill would insist that he pay up.


	6. Chapter 6

The Sojourner's Job

Last day of leave.

Evan wondered how he was going to spend it. He had already spent time with his family. His mother had been delighted with the two small oil paintings he had finished and brought home. Anywhere that inspired her 'little boy's muse' was good in his mother's opinion. He just wished that Atlantis was not classified; his painting of the City was definitely his best work in years.

He would still be at his parents' house, except that he needed to be in DC to sign more papers for the expedition. As a result, he had to find things not normally in Atlantis to enjoy instead of people. Ice cream looked good. The Marines could make a sort of ice cream, but it was bitter not sweet.

A slim hand slipped into his. "I want Rocky Road," Parker told him.

Evan squeezed her hand. "Sounds like a good idea."

They had ice cream and just walked about. They played a game of 'I spy the security camera' everywhere they went. Evan had to admit that Parker was better at the game than he was. They had dinner at a pizza parlor and Parker followed him to his hotel room. She was gone when he woke up. He packed the last of his things, put a fifty in an envelope for Clone Jack, and glanced around the room. Nothing was out of place. He caught his plane to Colorado and it was only when the captain sent to pick him up was piling an extra bag into the SUV, did Evan realize that Parker had given him a good-bye gift.

He asked for the extra bag to be placed next to him during the ride to the Mountain, under the pretense of needing something. Evan double checked everything to make sure that she hadn't tagged him with a tracking device.

She hadn't.

Parker had given him the climbing gear she had promised, an extensive set of lock picks that would probably be useless on Atlantis, new (expensive) paints and paintbrushes and tons of chocolate.

She had also given him her e-mail address, asking him to write her when he was back in town.

Evan considered the  e-mail and decided that she wouldn't mind if he wrote her during leave. Maybe she would even write back.


End file.
